The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I was kept awake all night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I should offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for bokeh caterwauling) to the receptionist the next morning, memek she rolled her eyes and porn declared the woman an crot ‘actrice’, memek or memek sex worker.

Now, porn according to this new memek study from the ever-liberal Swedes, bokep it all makes scientific sense. It confirms what most women know and bokeh all men dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, porn the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. In other words, memek you can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: crot there’s sex as performance art, crot and porn sex as genuine intimacy. And bokep when a woman is genuinely aroused, bokep trusts her partner and memek is not fearing for porn a fragile male ego, porn she’s far more likely to bokep gently sigh and bokep moan than shriek like the rabid memek super-vixen in my Parisian hotel.

In my days editing The Erotic Review magazine, bokeh female contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally memek on an occasional basis, bokep they’d explain, crot so they could make their partner feel happy, bokep while conserving their energy for bokep other tasks in hand. This was the conclusion of another study by two researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that crot erotic decibels were all about manners and porn ‘manipulation’, bokeh and bokep that women were prone to what they described porn as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over the finishing line, memek so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of ecstasy, crot the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: memek ‘I’m enjoying this, crot but can you get a bloomin’ move on.’ Sound familiar, crot ladies?

The only other reason to screech like a demented hyena is if your sex education comes from porn, porn where loud always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland crot said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: memek ‘As far as I’m concerned, crot that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, memek only if you want to attract a certain kind of attention.

In their book, bokep Sex At Dawn, memek Christopher Ryan and memek Cacilda Jetha concluded the most likely reason women were noisy during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby males bokeh that they were fertile and bokeh keen to copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, bokep I can understand bokep the need to advertise. But if you’re not, memek then men should take heed: porn the best sex may just be the quietest.

Paris

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